A friend of mine recently told me that he was looking for a new job. I know that he is a very hard-worker so I told him I would be happy to refer him to my Human Resources Department.
However, I made sure he knew that I wanted to look over his resume and offer him suggestions. After all, it’s my credibility on the line, too!

Areas of Improvement
These mistakes are common, so I wasn’t too surprised to find these areas of improvement.
Quantify Responsibilities and Achievements
He had a lot of impressive responsibilities and achievements on his resume. However, I only knew that because I know what his job (Manager of a Franchise location) entails. He was counting on the interview to sell himself, essentially. With just a few changes, we started to turn his resume into a more appealing job interview magnet.
Original #1:
Responsible for sales and cash management.
Revised:
Responsible for sales and cash management of a franchise store that generates $4 million dollars in revenue annually.
Original #2:
Supervision of team members and staff.
Revised:
Supervise, train, develop, and schedule 70 staff members to create an efficient and team driven work environment.
Original #3:
Controlling of budget and store supplies
Revised:
Execute a monthly budget of $250,000 to ensure product availability and customer satisfaction.
Those were just a few of the bullet points I helped him revise. He also went through and tried to quantify achievements in his other sections.
My goal was to get him in the right direction. You could further improve upon each responsibility and achievement if you know more statistics. For example, in revision #3, if you have implemented policies and processes that led to a customer satisfaction rate of 97%, put that metric in the bullet point!
Order of Headings
This one isn’t HUGE, but it’s something I recommended.
He has been out of school for 4 years and has a lot of great experience for the particular job he is applying for. I recommended putting his work experience section above his school section. Having school at top makes it seem like he is applying for an entry level position.
Adjust this as needed. You may be 5 years out of school and think it makes more sense to have education at top for a particular job application.
Space Usage
He did not use his space efficiently. The header with his name, address, and phone number took up a big chunk of space. And he went on to a second page.
I’m not one of those “OMG only use 1 page!!@” people. But it was obvious that his resume could fit onto one page without deleting anything. If you can fit on one page, you might as well.
Show Progression
Under work experience, he had only listed one job. Even though he has had his current job for more than 3 years, he should still try and show progression.
If you need to go back 8 years to show that you were at once a level below where you are now, that will show a history of promotion (hopefully based on results!).
Don’t Highlight Minutia
Under a section for other awards and honors, he listed some attendance award he got.
Yes, companies care about attendance. But is that worth the space on the resume? A “VP’s club of top performers” would look much better. If all you have is attendance, consider leaving it off.
Landing a Job
Hopefully the next step for him is to land a job.
That’s a general overview of the changes I made without going into too much detail. I might fill the before and after resumes with fake contact information and employer information so I can post them next week.
Does anyone have any other common mistakes or tweaks they find when going over someone’s resume?













December 8th, 2009 at 2:16 pm |
Those are great tips you gave him! I need to update my resume and I’ll have to remember some of these!
.-= Mrs. Money´s last blog ..Guest Post: Green Gift Wrapping Guide at Being Frugal! =-.
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MyLifeROI Reply:
December 11th, 2009 at 8:42 pm |
@Mrs. Money,
Thanks. If you have any questions or suggestions, let me know!
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December 8th, 2009 at 3:01 pm |
Having more specific numbers and projects is always better and gives you more to work with when discussing.
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MyLifeROI Reply:
December 11th, 2009 at 8:42 pm |
@Craig,
Definitely, the more specific the better!
“Don’t confuse effort with results.” My boss told me that at one of my first jobs and it has stuck.
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December 8th, 2009 at 8:14 pm |
This is a good post. It also seems to me that the standards and what people are looking for in an effective resume seem to change by the day. Its tough to keep up with the latest trends out there.
Good post
.-= David/Yourfinances101´s last blog ..Gifts from the Heart, Not the Wallet =-.
[Reply]
MyLifeROI Reply:
December 11th, 2009 at 8:43 pm |
@David/Yourfinances101,
The trends are pretty fluid. Whether it has to do with number of pages or whether or not to put your hobbies, do what is right for the job you are applying for, and most importantly do what is right for *you*
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December 9th, 2009 at 7:45 pm |
Yo MLR,
What do you think about “objectives” at the top of resumes? I personally think they are a waste of time, but I have friends/colleagues that say it should be on all resume’s. Thanks in advance.
Thanks for the tips btw.
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MyLifeROI Reply:
December 11th, 2009 at 8:44 pm |
@The Zen Capitalist,
Objectives are definitely a waste of time. As the commenter below me mentions… most objectives are “To find a position that utilizes my skills.” Well, duh. Why waste the space? On a resume, the objective is usually at the top… pushing down your important information!
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December 11th, 2009 at 8:30 pm |
One thing I notice on a lot of resumes, which is completely useless, is a “Objective”. Guess what usually is in the objective? “To get a job”. Well duh. lol So I actually put on my resume Summary (some people even have put Your Investment). In the summary, I throw in keywords and a summary of myself, skills, and what I can bring to the table. I think it makes a lot better sense to give the employer a teaser, rather then “Hey, I want a job – like everyone else”.
James
.-= James from Tech for the Masses´s last blog ..How to Change Facebook Privacy Settings =-.
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MyLifeROI Reply:
December 11th, 2009 at 8:45 pm |
@James from Tech for the Masses,
I didn’t even put that! For his resume he had an objective and I changed it to an “Overview” :
A results driven recent graduate who has excellent leadership and development skills. An energetic manager who has experience leading employees to hit results. Seeking a position with a company that can utilize my business skills to improve operations and create a winning team.
What do you think?
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James from Tech for the Masses Reply:
December 11th, 2009 at 9:21 pm |
@MyLifeROI, Great that you didn’t put that! I think it’s so typical and I hate how Graduate Services in Colleges just let their students look like doofs when they do.
I really do like your Overview. It’s all entirely relative to your field, but here is mine just for reference. I know I can spruce it up of course!
Information Technology Professional experienced in management, windows servers, project management, and system support. BSc in Information Systems as well as MCSE certified. Aptitude in Windows system administration along with network administration. Demonstrated talent for analyzing problems, developing cost-effective solutions, and simplifying procedures. Proven ability to effectively communicate and solve problems among diverse clientele. Committed to excellence by quickly learning modern technologies. Listed on LinkedIn (http://www.linkedin.com/in/jamestomwright).
Now… I kept most of it in regular, but words like management, MCSE, system administration, analyzing, cost-effective – I put them in bold. I just think it pops. I think the real idea behind using an Overview is to tease and make the employer WANT to read through the rest. I’ve gone through quite a few resumes before and I always made a short-list out of the ones that hooked me in the first few lines OR from scanning for keywords.
Oh yeah, if you dont have LinkedIn – get it. Its great! Plus, if its between you and another guy – the employer can login and see your already written real-time Recommendation letters.
- James
.-= James from Tech for the Masses´s last blog ..How to Change Facebook Privacy Settings =-.
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December 14th, 2009 at 4:59 pm |
It might be my chosen profession but the cover letter was almost as important as the Resume. Did you help out with that?
.-= Evan´s last blog ..TransUnion Settlement =-.
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December 16th, 2009 at 8:57 pm |
Very good advice. I’ll have to keep these suggestions in mind as I work to update my own resume. Great stuff.
.-= Roger´s last blog ..Weekly Thoughts: Don’t Trust Petitions =-.
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December 27th, 2009 at 6:33 am |
Thanks for sharing, here we learn about very well features. I thought I would leave my first comment
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January 8th, 2010 at 9:52 am |
Re: Responsible for sale and cash management of a franchise store….
Why not drop the responsible for and use: Manage sales and cash for a franchise store generating $4 million in revenue yearly.
Shows what I do and the results. Not what I am responsible for.
???
I conduct workshops and had a senior manager of another company sit in as a guest. The topic that day was resumes. She stated she likes profiles or overviews, not objectives. It tells her right off the bat some of your skills, abilities and traits.
In addition if she has not posted a position and receives a cold resume, the cover letter carries the weight, not the resume.
Re: Trends
They are fluid and what I have to get across is, what you did 3 or 4 years ago is NOT what employers want to see today. You have to make your resume address the employers needs and wants, not YOUR preferences.
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MyLifeROI Reply:
February 8th, 2010 at 1:14 pm |
@anthony,
I was trying to use a well-rounded assortment of verbs. I had already used supervise in the other bullet point, so I wanted to highlight the fact that he was held responsible for a huge part of the business. I think there is a connotation in the word responsible that makes people assume you are actively involved. Had I not already used supervise, though, I would probably have used manage instead of responsible.
Your last sentence is gold: Address the employers need and wants, not YOUR preferences. Perfect.
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